Breaking The Bonds Of Fate
by NotInUseAnymoreApologies
Summary: Sometimes in life we feel like our path has been set out for us. Sometimes these paths are ones that have been set out for us by others. Two boys, each with troubled lives, but together can they show each other that hope is not gone? And together, united, will they realise they don't have to be alone...and that they can break the bonds of fate?  Sirius/Remus
1. Decisions Made For You

**Disclaimer: I do not own the magical world of Harry Potter, however I do own this adaptation of the marauders lives. Any OC characters are figments of my imagination.**

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><p><em>21st March 1969<em>

Caramel eyes stared out of the window at the morning dew that was settled on the grass. They thought the droplets looked like gems, shining in the sunlight.

The boy, whose eyes were set on the outside world, had a calm façade on his face.

However his rigid body told otherwise.

He was troubled by the night's events. Throughout his life he had always kept himself at a safe distance from others, wanting some kind of normality in his life.

At his school he spent most time indoors, in the tranquillity of deserted classrooms, his only companion being a book to escape reality.

He yawned. It'd been another sleepless night, but for once it wasn't because of the nightmares he often faced when he shut his eyes. His nightmares usually consisted of darkness and the people who lurked in it. Sometimes he wondered if he was meant to be one of those people who lingered in the shadows, but he always shook the thought out of his mind. Tucking a strand of golden, light brown hair behind his ear, he left his room.

His mother sat anxiously at the kitchen table, twiddling her thumbs. Her blonde hair was tousled, and her eyes looked tired and worn out. When her son entered the room an uneasy smile adorned her face.

"Remus…" She started but her voice trailed off as he walked past her to the fridge. Getting a glass from the side he began to fill it with orange juice, ignoring the stares he felt.

"So now I'm getting the silent treatment?" His mother asked quietly, almost in a self pitying tone.

Remus sighed; his mother never told him anything. Sitting down at the table he waited for the thick, awkward atmosphere to fade, but it didn't.

Words needed to be spoken.

Remus looked at the orange juice in the glass, which was now swaying side to side like an ocean tide. He needed to concentrate on something trivial like this to calm his nerves.

Taking a deep breath he opened his lips and spoke, "Please tell me what's going on…" He looked up eventually to see his mothers' reaction. She wasn't even looking at him.

"Don't you love me enough to even tell me what's going on?" He raised his voice slightly. This, his mother responded to.

"Remmy please understand that no matter what happens one thing will never change, and that is how much me and your father love you." His mother tried to make eye contact at this point. The eyes that met her were hurt and confused. She leaned across to hold her sons hand, to comfort them, but Remus pulled away.

"Why? Why are you saying that?" Remus asked, hurt evident in his voice.

"Yes, doesn't he deserve to know?" A voice said from the doorway. A cold shiver ran up Remus's spine, a shiver of complete revulsion.

The man, who stood there, was the one who changed his life overnight. The one who shattered his trust; he was the one who was going to take away his normal life.

He was a large, ferocious-looking man, with grey hair and whiskers. He had an overall brutish appearance. He was currently giving Remus a snide grin. The thing that caught Remus' eye though was the rather disturbing tattoo on the mans arm. He was sure he saw it somewhere before, perhaps in one of his books…

"Is he ready to go?" The man said, with a cold tone.

"Ready to go where?" Remus' tone was one of panic.

"No he's not." His mother retorted.

"You know the deal, I'll be waiting outside." The man replied coldly. Once he left the room was filled with silence.

"Sit down Remmy." He sat down, when he saw the distant look on his mothers face, and the tears streaking down it.

"Before you were born…your father, he became so ill. So very ill," She sobbed, "He couldn't leave his bed, his body rejected medicine that doctors gave him. He was dying in front of my eyes…and there was nothing I could do about it. That's when I met Fenrir, that's the man who has been here, for the first time. He knew your father was a wizard, even though I didn't. He told me, he could help him, but at a price…that price was you."

"So…what you're saying is I belong to him?" Remus shouted, anger overtaking him.

"You have to go with him. I'm sorry Remus, I'm really sorry. We tried to get away…but he found us."

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><p>Remus closed the door to his house as he crept out the back exit, the one Fenrir had insisted on taking. He hesitated. Causing the man to turn and look at him.<p>

"You can't have second thoughts about this; it's not your choice." He stated coldly.

"I know." Remus replied emotionlessly. He ran a hand through his already messy hair. Fenrir growled rushing back and grabbing his wrist, hard. Tears sprang to his eyes. "That hurts." He yelled desperately trying to yank his arm away from the brute. He looked at the man, and saw the smile he gave him. Remus knew the image would be one that would become etched into his memory forever.

"Get used to it. There's way more to come."

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><p><em>14th August 1969<em>

"Remus!" The boy shuddered at his name being called. He had been hiding out in the tent hoping no one would notice his presence was missing.

The forest was a place he'd always associated with peace and serenity, but with his current company it had become a dark and twisted place. Taking a deep breath he calmed his frayed nerves. He left the tent.

The sun was setting, its light shining through the trees, colouring everything it touched in shades of orange and red. He walked towards the campfire. His mind trying to remember a time he felt happy.

"There you are!" Fenrir shouted mischievously. His teeth were showing, they were tinted yellow and several were missing. The man had got into a lot of fights, some with men, and some with creatures of the night.

Remus gulped. That tone never meant anything good. In fact anything Fenrir said never lead to anything good.

"What is it Master?" He responded, the words leaving a vile taste in his mouth. The men surrounding the fire let out hearty laughs, one even said,

'You have him well trained Fenrir!' like he was some kind of circus animal.

He felt empty inside, wanting to feel angry, but all too aware of the consequences. He told himself not to feel anymore.

"We have decided to change you...Tonight." Fenrir stated. Remus's blood ran cold, he started to shake.

"T-Tonight?" He stuttered, fear evident in his voice.

'Aww look he's scared.'

'Shakin' like a leaf he is!'

Of course he was scared. He'd seen what these men were like during a full moon. The transformation, the tearing of human flesh, the screams. He stumbled backwards as Fenrir approached him.

"Remus...There's nowhere you can run; it's just wood land for miles and miles. If we don't get you, you'll die from starvation, or thirst." Fenrir reasoned, but Remus knew he wasn't being nice, he was never nice.

"I don't want to be like you!" Remus shouted, but he regretted the words as soon as they left his lips. Not because he didn't mean them, but because Fenrir's eyes had darkened, and an intense anger was lurking in them.

He backhanded Remus.

"How dare you talk to me like that," He sneered, "You stupid, little..." He paused for a moment, seemingly thinking about something. His lips began to tilt upwards revealing a crooked smile, it was not a pleasant sight, and Remus knew it was a bad sign.

"How about we play a game Remus?" Fenrir said slyly.

"A game?" Remus asked.

He knew the full moon was soon and he needed to get away, but he was frozen in fear as Fenrir leaned down.

He could feel his breath against his ear.

Then Fenrir whispered, "Let's play...Hide and seek."

He pulled back and met Remus' eyes. Remus then could see the animalistic glint in them.

He ran.


	2. Here To Help

**Disclaimer: I do not own the magical world of Harry Potter, however I do own this adaptation of the marauders lives. Any OC characters are figments of my imagination.**

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><p>The moon had come out in all its glory, the light shining down, illuminating the boy as he ran.<p>

He was panting heavily. His legs were scratched from tripping, and his eyes wild. He'd felt like he'd been running for ages, but if running meant an escape from becoming one of those creatures he'd never stop.

He heard movement behind him; he'd seen how fast they were before. There had to be some place he could hide inside. Their footsteps were nearby, so he gathered all his strength and climbed into the small opening in a nearby tree.

Squashed, petrified and silent, he waited for the footsteps to pass.

He could see their large, inhuman forms casting shadows across the ground. They were coming closer. He hoped they couldn't hear his heartbeat, for it was pounding loud in his ears. The creatures grunted to each other, speaking in a language he didn't want to learn.

After a few moments of waiting, they started walking away from where he was. He remained silent a bit longer before letting out the shaky breath he had been holding. A breath which was one of relief.

But that was all they needed.

The creatures came back. The growls and crunching leaves became louder, until he was face to face with his worst nightmare. He saw deep into its bloodthirsty eyes, and knew it was Fenrir inside.

It was then he knew his fate was sealed.

Its disfigured claw grabbed Remus's arm before yanking him out of the tree. Remus yelled in pain, the nails digging into his arm, piercing his skin.

He struggled desperately, kicking, punching, doing everything he could...but it was all in vain. It pinned his arms down, and saw the blood leaking. It drifted closer to it and tilted its head curiously, in an almost a childlike way.

Leaning closer, it inhaled the scent of the fresh blood from the wound that it caused. Remus was still trying to escape from its grasp. But as teeth sank into the flesh on the curve of his neck, he knew he was going to become what he most hated, what he most feared.

A werewolf.

His screams rang loud through the forest, and his eyes shut, letting the darkness consume him.

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><p><em>23rd August 1969<em>

When Remus opened his eyes the first thing he noticed was the white walls surrounding him. Then he remembered the pain, the excruciating pain. He sat up and ran his fingers along his throat, unsure of whether it had truly happened.

Tears sprang to his eyes as he realised it did, the bite mark being the proof. He sobbed, his despair being the only noise in the room. It was then, when wiping his eyes dry, did he notice his change in clothing.

His muddy trousers, and blood soaked t-shirt had been replaced with a pale blue hospital gown. His wounds had been seen to, and his skin was no longer dirty, it was clean and it's original pale shade. His mind became filled with thoughts, and his heart with hope. Was he rescued?

He tried not to expect anything, tried not to let his heart take over his rationality. But for the first time in a while he was filled with optimism.

Looking around the room he decided to investigate, to learn more about his surroundings.

He stood up on unstable legs, the ache being a reminder of his failed run for freedom. As he stumbled around he noticed several peculiar things about the items.

There was a bar of chocolate on his bedside. He loved the taste of chocolate, but his mother rarely let him have it. The curious thing about the chocolate was the brand, a company called 'honey dukes'.

He'd never heard of it.

On the book shelf near the door, it was filled with books talking about sports. The main one being Qudditch. His father had tried to talk to him about this sport, but he never really understood it.

He knew he was a wizard, but he'd never seen anything to do with that world before, presumably to stop Fenrir finding him.

He heard footsteps outside the room, and quickly walked back to his bed. Sitting on it just as the door opened.

"Hello Master Lupin."

The man standing at the door seemed to be in his early twenties. He had blonde hair that curled up at the sides, and he had eyes of a forest green shade. He was wearing a loose shirt that hung just below his hips, and black trousers.

He looked at Remus with what seemed to be curiosity. Remus turned away feeling slightly scrutinised under his gaze.

"Who are you?" He queried.

The man walked fully into the room at his point and closed the door.

"How rude of me, my name is Cassius Dinsmore." The man said with a friendly smile on his face.

He had his hand outstretched to shake Remus's, but the boy was wary of others now, he did not want to put his trust in someone who may deceive him. Cassius sighed lowering his hand.

"What do you want with me?" Remus asked cautiously.

"I'm a recruiter, the assistant of the worlds most brilliant wizard...I know you're different Remus. We know you're a wizard," Cassius replied, he then proceeded to take the bar of chocolate from the side and handed it to Remus, "Eat some it will make you feel better."

"My mother won't let me have chocolate."

"What your mother doesn't know won't hurt her." The man answered with a wink.

Remus's stomach growled. He couldn't remember the last time he had eaten, and the smell from the chocolate was intoxicating.

Hesitantly he broke off a part and popped it in his mouth. All he could think at that moment was how it tasted like perfection. It was not too sweet, nor too bitter, and Cassius was right, it did make him feel better...until he finished the bar that is.

"Do you want to talk about what happened to you?" Remus was asked. The mans voice had taken a more serious tone.

Remus fidgeted, he was in two minds about telling him that. It wasn't that Cassius didn't seem like a nice guy, it's just he was scared. Scared he'd be disgusted with him, scared the kindness would disappear and he'd be left alone.

"I won't tell anyone. I'm under an oath of confidentiality."

Remus could tell the man was trying to establish some trust with him, but he wasn't convinced yet.

"How do I know? How do I know if I can trust you?" Remus asked trying to feign indifference, but it didn't work. Cassius could see right through him, and see the small, scared boy behind the façade.

"I'm not here to judge you, I'm one of the good guys," He looked Remus in the eyes, "I'm here to help."

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><p><em>16th September 1969<em>

"Where are we going?" Remus asked curiously, as they walked through the quiet, deserted London street. Cassius turned and smiled comfortingly at him.

"We need to pick up a few ingredients." He stated.

"What for?"

"I'll explain later, be patient," They stood outside a pub, "Now Remus I want you to stay close, where we're going is a very busy place and I don't want you to get lost."

Remus nodded in response. He looked up at the building. A sign hung from it reading- "The Leaky Cauldron? We're going into a pub? You do know I'm not old enough to drink yet don't you?" He asked perplexed as to why they were there.

Cassius simply laughed, "I know how old you are Remus, just trust me." With that statement he gestured the boy to follow him. As they entered the strong smell of liquor hit them.

Remus stuck close to Cassius, ignoring the many drunken slurs and wary looks cast at him.

He was lead to a door that took them out to what seemed to be a brick wall.

"Cassius?"

"Yeah?"

"Why is there a brick wall here?"

"Patience Remus, you'll see soon enough."

Cassius double checked the door, and his surroundings. He cautiously walked to the wall, and then tapped it several times in different places. Remus was enthralled by the preciseness and concentration Cassius was showing.

The wall began to unfold, bricks falling back revealing a world completely new to Remus. Old fashioned shops, and a long winding street lay ahead.

"Remus, welcome to Diagon Alley."

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><p><strong>Author Note: I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) Next chapter I will be venturing into the world of Sirius! Stay tuned :P<strong>


	3. Reflection

**Disclaimer: I do not own the magical world of Harry Potter, however I do own this adaptation of the marauders lives. Any OC characters are figments of my imagination.**

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><p><em>11th September 1969<em>

Eyes, a shade of stormy grey, stared in annoyance at the mirror. The boy was troubled, not just by the reflection staring back at him, but by how quiet it was. It was nearly midnight, and still not a sound from downstairs.

It made him anxious.

He let his fingers trace the mirror image. The boy who gazed back looked like him in every way. Same eyes, same lips, same height and even the same hair, but this boy wasn't him.

He didn't have his mischievous smirk, or the amused eyes. His clothes weren't comfortable; he was wearing a well fitted robe with the family crest…a family he didn't feel a part of.

His room was painted in a regal style, a bed with curtains, items he didn't need but his parents thought showed class. He knocked them onto the floor and watched with a sick pleasure as they smashed, destroying the untouched silence.

Realisation hit him hard; his parents were trying to sculpt him into the son they wanted. They had always favoured his younger brother, Regulus, and now they were trying to make him a true Black, an older son worthy of their image. Unhappiness uncoiled in his stomach, and his face became distorted with rage.

The mirror began to shake, his anger focused on the boy looking back.

Why couldn't they love him?

He knew why.

He didn't find amusement in the same things they did, didn't like to hurt others, was intrigued by muggles, and didn't want to follow in his families footsteps, a family full of hate for the world, a family full of murderers.

The image soon shattered into a million shards of light. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He could never be what his parents wanted. That was a lie. He could be…he just didn't want to.

"Mirrors are seven years bad luck you know Sirius." A tired voice said from the corridor. Sirius plastered a smile to his face and turned to face the younger boy.

In a loud, confident tone he stated, "Me? The almighty Sirius Black gets bad luck? Impossible! Besides did you see the way that mirror exploded? It was all like kaboom! I don't even need a wand, I have the power of my mind," He joked, "What you doing out of bed anyway Regulus?"

"Couldn't sleep," He yawned, "Came to see if you were awake still. Why are you breaking things so late?" Regulus said as he looked around the room.

"I needed to distract myself, I couldn't sleep either, it's too quiet." Sirius paused then smirked at his brother, "What happened to your hair?"

Regulus stuck his tongue out, and folded his arms in annoyance, "Mother said it looked nice…besides…" He smiled all too innocently, "…It's your turn tomorrow."

Sirius visibly shrunk, wearing their clothes was one thing he hated but getting his hair cut was something he loathed. He ran his fingers through his long, unruly hair, his hair was a part of his identity, and they were taking that away from him too.

He grimaced, "Maybe I could persuade mom-"

"-Not going to happen." Regulus chanted happily. Happy at the fact he wasn't going to be the only one looking stupid.

Sirius smiled for a split second at his younger brother, but that smile fell when he heard footsteps creaking up the stairs. Their eyes met and they became paralysed with fear. Sirius mouthed, "Be quiet." To the younger boy, in the vain hopes that if they were silent, they wouldn't be noticed.

He thought wrong.

The door screeched open, and a tall, looming shadow towered over the boys. Sirius shuddered with fear as a cold atmosphere entered the room along side it.

"Regulus, leave me and your brother to talk," The voice demanded. Regulus looked at his brother worriedly, "That wasn't a request Regulus. Leave now."

The younger brother threw sympathetic eyes at his brother before responding with, "Of course, sorry father." He left the room swiftly, and closed the door slowly behind him. Sirius wished he could have left with him.

He closed his eyes, and waited for the pain of his father's clenched fists upon his ribs, his arms, and his face. A broken mirror, seven years bad luck? He smirked sadistically at the thought. Life couldn't possibly get any worse than it already was.

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><p><em>12th September 1969<em>

Sirius sighed as his mother dragged him around countless shops in Diagon Alley. His bruises were fresh, and still pained him, but his mother could seemingly care less.

His hair, newly trimmed, was slick back and hardened with gel. At every opportunity that presented itself, he would try to wreck his new appearance.

"Sirius stop that!" His mother snarled, clearly embarrassed of his antics. She pulled him to one side and fixed his hair.

Her eyes skimmed over his appearance, carefully avoiding the bruises that adorned his face. She didn't care, and they both knew it. She just didn't want her image tarnished.

"Walburga?" A tall, blonde haired woman approached with a smile of her face. She was a beautiful young woman, but walked with an air of arrogance and superiority, that made her quite ugly. It was clear why she was friends with his mother.

A boy, about fifteen years of age, walked along side her. His long blonde hair was tied into a pony tail and his smug smile made Sirius feel sick to the core. Sirius snarled in disgust, one thought on his mind was how much he despised the Malfoys.

"Marcia! What a pleasant surprise!" The two women exchanged pleasantries, whilst Sirius glared at the boy.

"Nice haircut," said the boy. His lips curled upwards, and Sirius could tell he was being mocked.

"Pardon me, Lucius, but you've mistaken me for someone who gives a damn what you think." Sirius said in a monotone voice.

"Sirius!" His mother scolded, "Lucius was being polite, apologise!"

"Don't worry Walburga, boys will be boys," Marcia laughed, "I had to keep Lucius out of school this week. He's been ill the poor thing."

"Oh dear." His mother responded causing Sirius to roll his eyes at her attempt at sympathy. As if a creature like her could feel emotion.

"We're just picking up some OWL revision books and we'll be off, won't we pumpkin?" Marcia spoke in a sickly sweet tone. Lucius beamed.

"Yes mother." He replied. Sirius tried to stop the words coming out of his mouth, but he just couldn't.

"Slimeball." He muttered.

With that comment the conversation was over, and Walburga's anger was radiating off her. She pulled him down by Knockturn alley, gripping his arm a bit too hard. Sirius wouldn't have been surprised if there were bruises in the shape of her fingers later.

"You silly little boy! I ask for one moment with a friend and I can't even have that! I don't know how you expect me to even attempt loving you," She snarled, "You're a disgrace to the Black family name, why can't you just be more like your brother?"

"Because I'm not Regulus!" Sirius yelled, "I know he's your favourite, I get that, but I can't help who I am! I don't want to be a Black! I don't want to be a death eater! I don't even want to be your son!"

The slap was sudden, but not unexpected. He had felt his mothers' anger before. His cheek stung, and turned a deep shade of red. Tears invaded his eyes.

"Your father was right about you. Your worthless, no son of mine," She began to walk away, "You can find your own way home tonight, I'm sick of the sight of you."

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><p>Rain was just the thing Sirius needed. The gel on his hair began to dissolve, which was a good thing, the bad thing was that his mother had left him with no money. He sighed and scrambled through his pockets.<p>

Empty.

He sighed again. If he went into a shop they'd expect him to buy something, but it was a risk he'd have to take to get out of the rain.

He stopped at the nearest shop. The peeling gold letters over the door of the shop read 'Ollivanders', and the window consisted of a lone wand resting on a cushion. He took a chance and pushed the door open. A bell rung to alert the shopkeeper and he contemplated leaving. However, curiosity got the best of him.

Thousands of rectangular boxes were piled up to the ceiling. He stared about in awe, not noticing that he was not alone anymore. An older man, with pale eyes and white hair, had been watching the boy with a slight amusement. He decided to interrupt the boys wonder though whenever he attempted to pull a box out and nearly caused all of them to fall.

"Can I help you?" He croaked. Sirius turned around alarmed.

"I wasn't trying to steal anything! I was just looking that's all…"

"So I could see Master Black," The old man chuckled, "What brings you to my store?"

"I'm sorry, it was raining, and…" Sirius looked down, "…I didn't have anywhere to go." He spoke with an honesty that startled the older man, as Blacks were known for their dishonesty. It was then he noticed the bruise on the boys face.

He walked into the back of the shop for a moment, and came back out with a jar of yellow paste in his hand. Sirius looked at him confused. The old man smiled.

"It's bruise healing paste, sit down." He said calmly. Sirius sat down, but remained cautious.

"Are you Ollivander?" He asked. The man chuckled again.

"Yes I am." Ollivander responded. He applied the paste to Sirius's bruises and gradually they began to disappear.

"Thank you." Sirius said softly. He couldn't remember the last time someone had done something nice for him.

"Now if I'm correct you'll be turning 10 soon."

"Yup, next month!" Sirius replied smiling, "I'll be old enough to go to Hogwarts next year."

"Hmm," Ollivander looked at the wand piles, then back at the boy. The boy looked like he'd been through hell, "Master Black, how would you like your first wand early?"

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><p><strong>Author Note: I always picture Ollivander as a nice man :) let me know what you think! :D<strong>


	4. Curious Happenings

**Disclaimer: I do not own the magical world of Harry Potter, however I do own this adaptation of the marauders lives. Any OC characters are figments of my imagination.**

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><p>"Give me my wand early?" Sirius questioned in a confused tone.<p>

He looked once again at the assortment of boxes piled, then back at the old man whose eyes looked at him with some sort of sincerity.

"Well to be honest, you seem like you need a bit of cheering up. Besides it's not that early, but I'm sure having a wand as sort of self defence will come in handy…" Ollivander smiled, but it dropped slightly whenever he looked at the boy.

"Thank you, Sir, but, I don't have any money and couldn't pay. Besides, my parents would take it away from me as soon as I get home…" Sirius trailed off; getting lost at the thought of the home he lived in. He wondered if they even cared that he wasn't there yet.

"Never mind the money boy, and I'm sure a young lad like you is sure to hide things from his parents all the time." He replied. He smiled at the boy once again and this time it stayed. Sirius, on the other hand looked warily at him, surveying him.

He seemed in deep thought, contemplating his options, but eventually a cheeky smile appeared on his face. This was the smile he had been missing.

"Now I'm going to have to take a few measurements. I hope you don't mind." He pulled a tape measure out of his pocket, and examined the boy.

"Which is your wand arm?"

"My right arm, Sir." Sirius said with a nervous disposition.

Although this man was seemingly friendly, he was still a stranger. His eyes stared right at you, as though he could see every thought you had. Sirius decided he didn't like being analysed.

"Well hold it out then." He measured Sirius from all over, his tape measure floating as he wrote Sirius's measurements down in a notebook. By the end of his examination, Sirius felt kind of relieved.

"Right then, I believe I have got just the wand for you." He rushed into the back of the store, and Sirius followed purely out of interest. He watched as the older man climbed a set of ladders, grabbing a box from the top row.

Every shelf was covered with a layer of dust, and when Ollivander brushed it off carelessly it caused Sirius to cough. It made the boy ponder as to why the man hadn't invested in a house elf.

They were inexpensive, and the cleanliness would probably bring more customers into the shop. Where he lived he had a house elf, who even though was indeed a pain, let his family live a life free of dust.

"Ebony and unicorn tail, fifteen inches." He handed the box over to Sirius, after climbing down. Sirius's eyes filled with marvel, and his face lit up with a smile.

It was a simple box, shaded dark grey with a handwritten label. He took the lid off with anticipation, and stared at its contents. The wand looked like it was made for him. The shape was unusual, it wasn't curved like most wands, it had sharp edges and grew thinner towards the end. The shade was dark and sleek, and the wand itself had ominous engravings on it. He ran his finger down it, feeling an unexpected coolness radiating from it.

"Give it a go then." Ollivander urged. Carefully Sirius lifted the wand out of the box. The coolness of the wand drifted to his fingertips. It felt like the part of himself he had been searching for; a piece he never knew was absent.

Looking back at the shop owner he cautiously waved the wand. An ice cold breeze came from it, and a stream of small blue sparks appeared from the end.

"Very good Master Black, very-" Ollivanders praise was cut short, as the door to the shop opened, and the music of the bells filled the shop, "Excuse me for a moment."

Mumbling ensued at the front of the shop. Sirius, being the inquisitive young boy he was, wanted to see what was happening, so he walked closer to the exchange.

He hid behind the nearest pile of wands, and peaked over. There stood a man, around his early twenties, talking in a low voice. His blonde hair seemed unruly, and his eyes a shade of green he couldn't interpret.

"Remus come here please, won't you?" The man enquired.

"Um sure…" A soft nervous voice responded.

A chair scraped, and footsteps ensued. He was sure Remus was a boy's name, but the person looked too pretty to be a boy. With wide, innocent, honey coloured eyes, and seemingly sun drenched, golden hair, he was certain he had heard wrong. They wore a shirt that was buttoned all the way, and a dark brown scarf.

"Master Lupin-" He hadn't, "-I hear that you're looking for a wand?" Ollivander spoke softly and almost with a hint concern. Why was he concerned? Was the first thought that crossed Sirius's mind.

"Um," He paused and looked at the adult he had came with, the man nodded, "Yes." Remus answered.

He gazed around the room, with an unhidden astonishment. Then smiled slightly and seemed comforted. Sirius smiled, he imagined his expression had been something similar.

"Which is your wand hand?"

"I write with my right hand…"

"That's your wand hand then. Hold it out." Ollivander then, with his tape measure, proceeded to examine him. Sirius tried not to snigger at the boys' face, which was one of extreme discomfort, and slight embarrassment.

"Is this really necessary?" Remus asked in an attempt to escape the examining.

"Who's the wand expert here?" The old man replied, ending what was a pathetic attempt of escaping, "That will do, wait here one moment." Remus looked down at the floor and twiddled his thumbs, a nervous tic. The place itself had calmed him; it reminded him of an old library.

"Try this, maple and dragon heartstring, 9 inches." Ollivander passed it over to the boy without the case. Remus held the wand, with a look of puzzlement.

"Give it a wave then." Ollivander pushed. After sharing a perplexed look with his adult, he waved it. The only light in the room grew brighter, and brighter until it eventually shattered. Ollivander snatched the wand off the boy.

"No, no. Definitely not."

Sirius couldn't help but chuckle under his breath at this. His wand was right the first time, and at that he felt incredibly proud, yet a bit disappointed that he didn't get to destroy anything like Remus.

Ollivander walked to the back, and cast Sirius an inquisitive glance when he caught him hiding behind the pile.

"Right then, Master Lupin, give this wand a go. Ash and unicorn tail, 9 inches."

Remus hesitantly took the wand from the mans hands, perhaps afraid of the same outcome as last time. His eyes widened in bewilderment at the first touch, and when he waved it this time his face lit up with a warm glow that was cast from the end of the wand.

Sirius opened his mouth in amazement, as the boys' wand cast a peculiar wind. He looked at Remus' face, and found himself blushing, when he noticed the boys eyes had closed and that his mouth was open in a 'o' shape. He found it a weirdly cute thing for a boy to do.

He shook his head in disapproval at himself. He was a tough boy, boys do not think things are cute; at least…that was what he told himself.

"Very good Remus!" The young man said with a tone of happiness. The moment was finished, and Remus looked at the man, leaving Sirius with an unhappy stirring in his stomach.

"Thank you Cassius." He responded almost shyly.

"We'll take it. How much will that be?" Cassius said with eagerness.

"That'll be 5 galleons." As Cassius rummaged through his pockets, Sirius suddenly felt an urge to sneeze.

He blamed it on the high levels of dust. Scrunching his nose, he bit his hand slightly not wanting to make any noise. He never had such luck. Within moments, a quiet sneeze escaped his lips, which didn't go unnoticed by Remus.

"What was that noise?" Remus asked warily.

"What noise?" Cassius asked his voice now alert. Sirius felt himself panic. What would he say if they noticed him? Oh sorry I just felt like watching you from behind this pile of wands. Nothing suspicious or weird here. After a long, drawn out pause, Remus sighed.

"It must have been nothing, just me being paranoid." Remus spoke softly. His senses had been extremely heightened the past week, he felt uneasy.

Cassius finally found his change, paid, and nodded knowingly at Ollivander. "Remus we just have to pick up one more ingredient and we'll be done for the day," He turned and smiled at Ollivander, "Thank you, for everything." After that they left the shop.

Sirius came out from behind the wand pile, and took a deep breath. There was something about that boy he couldn't put his finger on.

"Curious…" Ollivander commented as he closed the till.

"What was?" Sirius responded with caution. The older man looked at him with an undisguised intensity that made him feel under scrutiny.

"Your reaction to that boy."

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><p><strong>Author Note: I really researched my wand choices for Remus &amp; Sirius, so I hoped they matched up to what you imagined them to be :) <strong>


	5. Jekyll & Hyde

**Disclaimer: I do not own the magical world of Harry Potter, however I do own this adaptation of the marauders lives. Any OC characters are figments of my imagination.**

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><p>Cassius stood in front of a cauldron mixing and adding various ingredients. His sleeves were rolled up, and his forehead had a sheen that was from the layer of sweat.<p>

Remus cocked his head to one side and watched. They were in Cassius's home. It was a small place, but had a certain cosiness to it that Remus the boy could appreciate. The sun was setting outside, and Remus felt a sharp pain run through his body. He chose to ignore it.

Cassius, on the other hand, noticed and didn't attempt to mask his concern, before returning to the task at hand. He stirred the potion in the cauldron with an ill disguised urgency. The liquid in the pot was a shade of midnight blue, and released quite a potent odour.

"Tonight is going to be a hard night for you Remus." Cassius stated with a dark look on his face.

Remus knew.

He had felt it, and knew with every ounce of his being that the time would come. When at home he had read a book on moon cycles, he remembered that the book had mentioned that a full moon occurs every 29.5 days. That meant his first transformation would be tonight.

It explained why his senses had been heightened. It was the beast, the animal in him waiting to get out.

"Please…" Remus started, causing Cassius to give him his full attention, "Don't let me kill anyone, don't let me completely become a monster. I don't want to lose my last shreds of my humanity." His eyes filled with unshed tears.

Cassius felt pity for the boy. He hadn't wanted this, he was just a child. He looked back into the cauldron at his creation.

"You won't," The potion omitted a faint blue smoke, and Cassius lowered the heat of the potion, "It's ready, but before you drink it, I need you to follow me."

He led Remus down to the basement of his house, to a room filled with chains that were attached to the wall. At first glance you'd believe they had entered a medieval torture chamber. It was a dark room, only lit by a small candle in the corner. As Remus walked in, Cassius closed the door.

"What is this?" Remus asked, his voice held fear. Cassius looked down at the floor, his face concealed by the darkness. He didn't want to do this, but he knew it had to be done.

"This room…is for you. This is where you'll stay at the moment during your transformations. I need to put these chains on you, to stop you from being a risk to others." He spoke, his voice low.

Remus lowered his eyes to the ground, and it was hard to tell what thoughts must have been racing through the boys mind.

"Do what you need to do." He responded with in an emotionless tone of voice.

However, just as Cassius was about to prepare the boy Remus began to yell in agony. Cassius knew he had to act quickly.

"It's your body preparing you for the transformation. We don't have much time." He clasped the boys' wrists, ankles, and neck with the metal chains. Remus reached out and grabbed his arm.

"H-Help me!" He gasped out. Cassius nodded and ran out of the room. Leaning down to the cauldron, he scooped as much of the wolfsbane potion as he could into a jar he'd prepared earlier. He prayed to Merlin it would help.

He sprinted back down the stairs to where the boy stood currently clutching his head in distress. The chains hung from him.

"It hurts!" He yelled, tears streaking down his face.

"I know. Drink this it'll help." Cassius said in a calm voice. He grabbed the boys chin roughly and opened his mouth with force. He tilted the jar, pouring the foul tasting liquid between his lips. Remus spluttered and choked the liquid down.

"Stop it!" He cried. But he was ignored. He couldn't stand it, he felt like he was being suffocated. So the small boy, in an attempt to stop the man, lifted his arms and pushed him away.

The jar Cassius held fell to the floor, spilling all its contents, and not knowing his new strength, he sent the man flying through the air causing him to hit the back wall. The young man scrambled to his feet and walked to the door. Closing it, he chanced on final look at the boy.

Remus lifted his head and looked him directly in the eyes. There was a moment of pure silence in the room before Remus whispered, "I'm sorry."

He heard his heart beat hammering in his ears, as blood pulsed through his veins at an alarming rate. Cassius watched in amazement, and horror, as the boys eyes started to become sunken and his pupils started to dilate.

Then he screamed.

It was a horrible sound, one of pure agony, a sound Cassius knew he would remember forever. He closed the door and barricaded it. He wasn't going to take any chances tonight.

Remus looked at his hands as claws ripped through the skin of his fingertips. He froze in sheer terror watching blood drip down his fingers onto the floor. His skin turned a grey-blue colour, and thin fur crawled its way up his arms and all over his body.

His bones began to dislocate, stretching to his arms and legs to inhuman lengths, causing pain to burn through his veins like a poison.

His skin tightened around his muscles and bones, and his spine pushed out causing him to slouch whilst standing. The clothes he wore tore, as his form became more disfigured.

He couldn't stop screaming, as he felt his body change beyond recognition. A loud cracking noise resonated around the room, as he felt his jaw become dislodged. His teeth sharpened along with it, and started to tear their way through his gum. A coppery taste filled the boys' mouth, and he let out a loud shriek as he realised the taste was his own blood.

His screams stopped. Still in tremendous pain, he began to whimper. He hoped the change was finished. Then, out of nowhere, a loud howl escaped from the boys lungs. His eyes went hazy, and then all he could see was darkness.

The boy was gone for the moment, and in his place was the werewolf.

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><p><em>18th September 1969<em>

White walls surrounded the boy when he woke up. He thought at first he had died, but as he looked around he realised he was in his room. He felt disappointed.

Giving up on this life was easy. To continue was something that required strength, and perseverance. Two things the boy didn't think he possessed.

He was a quiet boy, he didn't like confrontation, and so fighting a battle with the monster inside him was not something he was ready for. He was too young to have to deal with all this pain.

What worried him, perhaps the most, was that he couldn't see anything out of his left eye. He tried to remain calm, but panic clawed away at his insides. His body ached, but he wasn't surprised. He looked at his fingers, all of which were bandaged. He wanted to survey his injuries.

"You're awake," Said a relieved voice from the doorway. It was Cassius.

"Unfortunately." Remus deadpanned.

"Not unfortunate. The first night is always the hardest. Most people who are bitten don't live past it," He smiled, "You're stronger than you look." Remus knew Cassius was trying to lighten the situation, but he wasn't the one who had to live with this curse. The boy felt bitter, jealous at the people who had died. They didn't have to continue with their existence.

They were free.

"Can I have a mirror please?" He asked calmly, although his nerves were actually in pieces. Cassius's eyes looked away distressed.

"I don't believe that is a good idea," He looked back at the small boy, "Wait until you've recovered and then I'll give you one."

"Please Cassius, this is important."

He needed it. He wanted to see he was truly human again. After such an experience, he needed to see that the beast was completely gone…for the moment anyway.

Cassius sighed dejectedly and left the room. Within seconds he returned holding a small mirror in his right hand. "Before you look at this you need to know several things." Remus nodded, his thoughts racing.

"First is that when you changed the amount of wolfsbane you had consumed wasn't enough to help. This is why you'll only probably remember the transformation and nothing else." The small boy nodded.

"The second thing is that whilst you had the chains on you, I didn't tighten them as much as I originally thought," The man gulped, "That was my fault, I let you down on that part. I'm sorry."

"Finally please remember…time heals all wounds. With medicines, and magic you'll be fine in no time." He smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. Remus felt sick. The mirror was passed into his hands face down.

"I'll leave you alone for a moment, but please remember everything I've said." The man left the room, with a stagger. Guilt ran through the boy as he realised that was his fault.

Breathing deeply, he slowly turned the reflective glass over.

His breathing stopped.

His left eyes was covered with a white bandage, this contrasted with his bruised skin. His lower lip was swollen and cut, and the area around his eyes was darkened. Lifting his right hand he pulled the fabric off his eye.

A thin red line led from the top of his eyebrow to his bottom eyelid. He felt his breath quicken. He took off the t-shirt he had been wearing, and cast it to one side. His chest was covered in around seven thin scars, and coloured with bruises. He looked at his arms, and legs, they were the same.

He felt panic bubble in his stomach. Why him? He never asked for any of this. He just wanted a quiet life. A peaceful life.

He threw up over the side of his bed, and tossed the mirror down to the floor. It cracked down the centre. When Remus looked in the mirror again, he saw himself mirrored twice.

Strangely he then heard laughing. He realised it was himself. The laugh was hysterical, almost manic. His eyes watered and his body shook.

The two pieces of the mirror, to him, represented the two sides of him. It reminded him of a book he once read. Jekyll and Hyde, he was the monster and the boy.

His sight blurred and his laughter turned into sobs, as the tears trickled down his cheeks. He didn't want to be a monster.

Cassius re-entered the room, and tried to say soothing things to the boy such as, "It'll all be okay."

But Remus knew otherwise. Nothing would be okay ever again.

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><p><strong>Author Note: I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) Writing this chapter was very hard considering there is little description of it in the books, so I hope I managed to pull it off! :) Let me know what you think please!<strong>


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